This coming Monday night, Tomas - my youngest - will be boarding a plane to the UK. His anticipation is palpable. For him, this flight is a movement towards, rather than away. A double Sagittarian, he was born to travel, ponder, seek, research, teach, touch, learn. . . He's living his passion, preparing to enroll for post-grad. study in Philosophy and Finance (esp. the Philosophy of Finance) at Cambridge University. Seeing him onto the plane will be one of those 'thrill/pang' moments with which we are all so familiar. . . a fierce embrace/deep release moment in which the heart will be called to open wider. Further. More.
It's the middle of the night here. I'd ordinarily be sleeping at this hour, but a storm woke me (rain first tickling then thrumming on my studio's corrugated iron roof), so I've been rustling through old iPhoto albums and emails in search of I'm not sure what, but very likely because I needed to come upon this again -
". . . May your hands weather with grace. May your fingers smell good. May chill on your arms keep you alive to your skin as much as warmth might do. May you grieve when you need to and know your own lacks, with matter-of-fact awareness, like you know the landscape of leaving where you sleep to begin the day. Leave the sleep. Begin the day. Offer things. Work. Build. Step toward others. Take a lean and a fall as a chance to spin on the floor on your back. Gather your courage. Make beautiful meals. Know your gifts and delight in them with specific, attentive vigor. Shovel. Pedal. Cruise. Oh, my darlings and others, listen as if you mean it, as if it matters, as if that act, in itself, were consuming and a kind of completion. When the moment opens, answer. The toilet might be running again in the other room. Get up, shake the handle and keep going. If the water goes quiet, there will still be ticking. We are our ordinary lives, and they have such depths and textures. We brush against the nap in relationship, or we're pressed to the plush, or something is jabbing, the plastic stem of an old tag, a broken zipper, but we dress in the fabrics of the lives near ours, however we bring them near. Such clothes. Such colors. . . "Susan Stinson (visit Susan's website here and her blog here.)
( ( ( ( ( ( ( ( ( ( ( O ) ) ) ) ) ) ) ) ) ) )) O ((((( O ))))) O (( ( ( ( ( ( ( ( ( ( ( O ) ) ) ) ) ) ) ) ) )
The journey is the destination. Wishing him a great experience.
ReplyDeleteA gorgeous post, Claire, overflowing with love and an undercurrent of grateful tears. xo L, M.
ReplyDeleteIf he ever comes to Ireland he will have a home and a friend.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Antares C - it's all about the journey, yes. I will pass your wishes on to Tomas, who will appreciate them.
ReplyDeleteThere is indeed much love, Melissa - and, yes, there will be tears when he goes. He is not one to look back - no pillars of salt for my son! He has taught me a great deal about paying attention, staying present to the moment and trusting both past and the future to take of themselves. I will miss him at least as much as I will celebrate the fact he's doing exactly what he's called to do. Bless him. And thank you, M. L, C x
ReplyDeleteJohn, I imagine Tomas would love a trip to Ireland at some stage while he's there. . . thank you for extending the hand of friendship to my son. I have no doubt you and he would have plenty to talk about - C
ReplyDeletei completely relate to this, claire, as you know. our big handsome boys (men). it's astonishing, literally stunning. still, i believed when i became a mother that my job was to raise a child capable of being able to leave me. it's awfully nice when they look back and wave...but the stride forward is, finally, the important measure.
ReplyDeletemuch love to you---and him!
--susan
The Grand Adventure...it is the destiny of some, as is the clarity to know when to take the leap. To be the mother of such a son (I typed sun) says much about you both. All good wishes for Tomas and you, Claire. xo
ReplyDeleteDear Susan - ah yes, I know you know. . . Parenting is a puzzle, and a paradox; we engage fully in these all-involving relationships with our children precisely so that they can go out into the world one day and be confidently independent of us. And us, of them. Their striding forward is the important measure, I agree. i suspect they might say/wish for the same thing re; us? How much we learn from one another! L, C xo
ReplyDeleteDear Marylinn - thank you for your good wishes. Tomas has been - he is - one of my life's great teachers. I am going to miss him a great deal but when I think ahead to the times we are living in, how grateful I am to know that we are connected despite distance? Once upon a time, saying farewell to a loved one as they, or we, embarked upon a journey to other climes, meant a finale of some kind. Nowadays we have the internet and can link up with each other at the drop of a hat - do you think we might be entering a time when contact becomes increasingly 'through the non-physical world? (Which is not to say that physical contact is not still enticing, encouraging, comforting, etc. . . just that the non-physical/metaphysical/spiritual world can meet us in all the same ways?)
ReplyDeleteIt's late and I wonder whether what I have written here makes any sense at all? I will let it be, though, and perhaps you will come by and expand what I have said here?
Love to you in Pasadena, Claire xo
Good luck to your son, Claire. Not only to the adventure itself, but to learning new things and seeing new things and all the wonder that comes along with it. What an amazing experience. He will be well for it. I remember the fear and giddy excitement of moving to a new place and of starting over. It's incredible to look back and see how far we've come.
ReplyDeletexoxo
Rachel
Dear Claire, Since I experience, increasingly so, any self-knowledge through spiritual awareness, I believe that our connection to others has the same origin. No, it doesn't take the place of human touch but as physics makes us question what we thought we knew about time and space, or confirms what we intuited, we may have more ways to be with each other than we ever dreamed. I discount nothing; it seems all things are possible. If that expands your thoughts...Pasadena and I send love back, Marylinn xo
ReplyDeleteWV - biants. They are bigger than giants.
Beautiful journey to your son. It's a pleasure to see my work coming around again in this context. Thrive.
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